No news is good news

Victoria came with me on December 20th to my 9 month surveillance tests with Dr. Lingas.  Essentially the bloodwork analysis and chest / abdomen and lymph node checking are all to check the status of my cancer...to try and assess whether the chemotherapy has been successful at killing the remaining cancer cells post resection surgery.  The bloodwork is a CEA test which looks for the carcinoembryonic antigen or a protein in my blood that is evidence of colon cancer.  The physical exam looks for evidence of spread or invasion to lungs, abdomen, pelvis and lymph nodes under my armpits.

Surprisingly I was not as anxious as I would have thought I would be...and I owe it to the fact that with a newborn baby at home I have no desire to focus on anything negative with my own health and have been 100 percent, 24 hours a day, 7 days a week consumed with Benjamin and Victoria.  Or perhaps it was because we spent a lot of time talking with Dr. Lingas about babies, breastfeeding, sleep and NOT cancer. 

But...alas the reason for the appointment with Dr. Lingas eventually manifest itself and we discussed the state of things.  Although she did not have the CEA test results back she did have the CBC (complete blood count) analysis to analyze how my recovery from treatments is coming along.  The bloodwork shows that my immune system is recovering...my white blood cells look to be restored to normal, my neutrophils are normal.  For the red blood cells and platelets the news is a little less positive with my counts still being lower than normal.  Not dangerously low or anything to worry about as they are trending upward but still evidence that the 7 months of chemo really wiped out my system and that it will take time to recover.  As for side effects we talked about some of my appetite, my GI system, my bowel movements - yes - a frank discussion of my bowel movements.Obviously we are all acutely interested in the health of my colon and whether there was any negative warning signs...blood, abnormal stools....all the symptoms I had experienced prior to the diagnosis of Stage 3B Colon Cancer and prior to my colonoscopy and then colon resection surgery.  I am happy to report to you (as I was to Dr. Lingas) that my bowels are working great...never been better actually.
We discussed other side effects that I am still struggling with such as my neuropathy, my fingers being a complete mess, my fatigue and extreme weakness in my hips and legs.  She examined my lungs, my pelvis, my abdomen, my armpits, my neck...all seems clear.  And we talked very openly, candidly about future surveillance.  She knew I was already scheduled for a colonoscopy in March, one year after my original diagnosis but I told her frankly that I wanted to stay as aggressive as we can in terms of surveillance.  You see I don't want to go 6 months or a year only to discover that there has been a recurrence or a spread of the cancer and that if we had have caught it earlier through surveillance we could have had positive outcomes or greater opportunities to resolve it.  So Dr. Lingas supports me having further CT scan in March as well.  We discussed the benefits and cons to either CT scanning versus MRI testing and decided to stick with CT scan.  My naturopath had suggested looking at a less radioactive approach than CT scan but if it is the best option for surveilling my type of cancer then let's stick with it.  So...three months from now will be a critical milestone in terms of my cancer journey.  One year surveillance with both scope and with CT will give us a good picture of my battle and our success at kicking the crap out of those damn cancer cells.

Oh yeah..as for the CEA test Dr. Lingas and I have a deal.  She will ONLY call me during the holidays when she checks the results of the test if there is something concerning in the results - if the CEA levels are elevated.  Otherwise and although it may sound cliche..."no news is good news".  (and it is December 29 so I am assuming...no I am stating that all is well and that the CEA test showed no elevation of the cancer markers in my blood).

Until next post I hope and wish for all of you to be surrounded by love, peace, joy and laughter...and of course great food and drink!!! After all it is the Christmas season!

CEA...like the CIA...it's all about surveillance

This post is a return to discussion of my cancer journey as I am preparing myself mentally for the next round of surveillance tests, at the 9 month post-surgery and diagnosis mark.  December 20.  Another significant date.  You see it is on December 20 that I have another special blood test, the CEA test (Carcinoembryonic Antigen), and meet with my Oncologist.   If you remember from a previous posting, the CEA test is a blood test that is part of the surveillance protocol specific to colon cancer.  Cancer of the colon typically secrets a protein known as carcinoembryonic antigen and 70% of colon cancer patients return positive markers for this protein . http://www.lifelabs.com/Lifelabs_BC/Patients/MedicalConditions/Colon_Cancer_-_CEA.asp
So...elevated levels of CEA in the blood can indicate recurrence of the tumour or metastatic spread to other areas of the body.  My last CEA test in August showed no elevation of this marker.  Now, some weeks after the completion of my chemotherapy regimen, this test will be important to gauge the success of the drug therapy at preventing recurrence or spread of the cancer.

One week before Christmas...great timing.   I realize that with the birth of my son recently I have been entirely focused (thankfully) on something other than my cancer and this upcoming next milestone.  But I would be lying if I didn't recognize that there is always in the back of my conciousness this anxiety about this test.  I guess I accept that this will be my "fate" for the next several years - trying desperately to NOT think about the battle, to NOT fear the worst - and focus on the positive, life-affirming things in my world. So...until then I remain focused on my life with Benjamin and Victoria.  You cannot get more life-affirming than having a newborn baby to nuture, to watch develop and grow. 

My health is slowly (and I emphasize slowly) improving.  Ironically, I have been stricken with a bad cold - ironic because I endured 7 months of treatments, a complete bottoming out of my immune system, being at high risk for infection and being on alert for any fever or cold/ illness that could be serious for someone immune compromised like me without getting sick other than the drug side effects.  Then, within a month of completing these treatments I get this.  Oh well.   It is what it is.  I am starting a new supplement regimen now to restore and rebuild both my GI system and my immunity.  This includes bovine colostrum supplements, Vitamin C powder, Plant Sterols, probiotic supplements and lots and lots of ginger, garlic, green and white tea.  I recognize that it took 7 months to pretty much destroy my GI tract and immune system so it will take some time to restore my systems to health.  My energy level is getting better each day.  My taste buds are coming back - YIPPPPPEEEEE!!!!!!!!  Unfortunately my fingers and toes are still a friggin' mess.  I have difficulty typing, writing, holding anything in my fingers that requires fine motor skills and my nails are just a disaster.  They are rippled, cracked, hurt and will take months to grow out.  And I have discovered a new side effect that is not getting better at all - when I close my eyes when standing such as in the shower I become immediately imbalanced, disoriented and almost dangerously unsteady.  But, again, it is what it is.  I am determined to recover, keep my diet healthy, get physically fit as best as I can, continue to manage my mental and emotional health through activities like the registered massage therapy and this blog (I use this blog as my own release, my own therapy if you will).

Until next post, much love and good health to all. 

Look who decided to join us

It has been a few weeks since my last post but I have a pretty good reason for my "silence"...you see I / we have been a bit busy lately.  Many of my Blog followers may have already heard the news through the grapevine or through emails and messages sent out but for those who haven't yet heard...Victoria and I are proud to announce the arrival of our beautiful and healthy son, Benjamin Edward Brown, born at 1:02 pm, Sunday November 25, at St. Joseph's Hospital in Toronto via unplanned C-section and weighing in at 6lbs and 11 oz.   We were supported by our midwives from Midwife Alliance, and our super awesome doula, Kinsi (sp?).  Victoria went into labour in the afternoon on Saturday November 25 and then active labour by about 11pm.  Our midwives and doula arrived at our home shortly after midnight and they helped me support Victoria who slowly dilated and increasingly got nearer to being ready to push.  But, Baby Benjamin had other plans I guess as he never fully dropped into position.  Our midwife, Abir, worked to stretch Victoria and have her progress but after after a few hours of pushing, consults with the doctors at St. Joe's to determine if Ben had dropped enough to be assisted out, and agonizing exhausting painful labour for Victoria, it became a more urgent situation.   Little Benjamin apparently pooped in the womb and his heartrate went into distress.  Benjamin decided to force his mother and I to veer from our birth plan after approximately 14 hours of active labour on Victoria's part but in the end it all worked out for the positive. 

 

And a special shout out to all the staff, the nurses, doctors at St. Joseph's - they are just spectacular.  Like the treatment I received on the Surgical ward after my surgery in March and the compassion with which I have been cared for by the Oncology team over the past several months...every staff member we interact with at St. Joe's is just great.  Truly this is a special hospital.

We are all doing well.  Victoria is slowly recovering from the events of the day almost a couple of weeks ago.  Benjamin is thriving (as his Nana would lovingly say), feeding well, and sleeping like a Champ for the most part.  He has decided he wants to sleep soundly throughout the day and be alert, fussy and needy from about midnight to early morning.  It's been a couple of weeks of wonderful firsts...first bath, first poop, first pee all over his Mom and we look forward to every day of firsts with our son. 

Attached are some pictures we had taken in the hospital...you will see that he inherited his Dad's prominent nose, piano-playing fingers and bend-it-like-Beckham feet and Mom's beautiful eyes, mouth, chin and forehead.

Also, a huge shout out to all of you who continue to show us much love and support.  We appreciate it!

But, lastly there is someone that deserves special recognition. Victoria:  I am entirely in awe of your truly amazing strength for what you endured during the labour.  You sacrificed so much and faced it all with such calm strength that you awed not only me but all those who supported you for those 14+ hours.  Thank you.  And seeing you with Benjamin, watching him thrive every day just further reinforces what I have known for some time now.  You are as wonderful a mother as you are a wife and partner to me.

This old man...he played eight

Just an update for all on my recovery from 7 months / 12 cycles of FOLFOX chemotherapy treatments on Day 8 of Treatment 12 and a Baby Brown update...

Quite frankly I feel very much like someone who has just completed seven long months of chemo, three cycles of Neupogen injections to stimulate bone marrow production of neutrophils and three treatment delays due to bottoming out of white blood cells or platelets.  I think I am now on the other side of the immediate side effects of Treatment 12 such as nausea, GI issues, extreme fatigue etc. and yesterday was a turning point for my appetite...it may just be coming back now.  I still have compromised sense of taste and feel / taste my teeth 24 hour hours a day so it really cuts into my enjoyment of food.  But, I am meeting up with good friends for lunch today and I am soooooo excited....I cannot wait for the Medium-hot chicken sandwich with mushrooms,  cut and sauce on the side from California Sandwiches.  I haven't enjoyed a Cali sandwich for months....actually I have had very little junk food, fast food, since March and I think I have earned it. A shout-out to Laura and Dom Cianflone for helping me "celebrate" the end of my treatments today with some well-deserved fast food ;-)

 It's the other more impactful side effects to the treatment that have proven to be cumulative just as pretty much all the healthcare professionals that have been a part of my treatment team and fellow cancer patients said they would be. And these side-effects are simply brutal and vary in terms of how long my recovery will be from them.  As an example, my fingers right now are just messed up - they hurt, the nails are bubbling and showing these weird growth rings, are super-sensitive to cold, and just a bundle of nerves.  I drop everything.  I cannot write legibly - even filling out a cheque is a chore.  Typing on my keyboard for this post is slow and I am constantly backspacing out the numerous typos I make.  Texting on the BlackBerry is brutal.  My feet are not as bad as my fingers but the nerve damage in my toes and feet is driving me crazy.  They feel like they are in a constant state of nerve firing.  My hips, legs, calves, quads, spine, lower back all ache and have 0 strength. In discussions with my Oncologist it is not entirely a certainty that these side effects will resolve themselves any time soon.  In fact, the neuropathy and nerve damage in the fingers and feet could very be permanent.  They may get somewhat better but may never fully resolve themselves.  And I am ok with that...after all it was my decision to NOT reduce the dosage of the chemo as per my Oncologist's warnings.  I knew the risks of long-term permanent damage but was determined to go at the treatments with full dose...kill the b#$%rds.  Don't give them any leverage.

I feel like an old man - hence the title of this post....

This old man, he played eight,
He played knick-knack on my gate;
Knick-knack paddywhack,
Give a dog a bone,
This old man came rolling home.

My overall fatigue level is improving but it only takes a walk around the neighbourhood with Parker to wipe me out for a few hours and necessitate rest and numerous naps.  My taste buds are shot, my appetite is not yet back to normal, my GI tract is all messed up.   Ironically, although my lack of strength and the way I walk makes me feel like "this old man", from the neck down I look and feel much like an adolescent teenage boy - you see my hair continues to thin out and fall out in some areas.  I have said "Good-bye" to my armpit hair, my chest hair, leg hair and lower extremity hair and even the hair on my toe knuckles.  Yesterday I tried to move our winter tires out of the storage locker and believe it or not I had to muster every ounce of strength in my body just to lift the tires up waist high...I just don't have any muscular strength.  None.  Nada.

But it's all good.  They are done.  I now have nothing but focus for Victoria and our baby that is soon to arrive.  She is 37.5 weeks now - officially full term and Baby Boy Brown has started to drop - his head is now resting "uncomfortably" on Victoria's bladder and pelvis.  But soon....so soon.

A pregnant and sexy Cat in the Hat!

A very spoiled Parker....he and I have spent A LOT of time together these past several months

Until next time...good health and good spirits to all of you.  Thanks for taking the time to stop and read awhile.

Corey Hart may have said it best

Don't get me wrong...I am not a huge Corey Hart fan but in honour of today being the first day of my last Treatment - yes, Treatment #12 is underway!!! - I actually catch myself thinking of the lyrics to the song "Never Surrender":


With a little perseverance you can get things done
Without the blind adherence that has conquered some
And nobody wants to know you now
And nobody wants to show you how

So if you're lost and on your own
You can never surrender
And if your path won't lead you home
You can never surrender

And when the night is cold and dark
You can see, you can see light
And no one can take away your right
To fight and to never surrender, to never surrender



Never Surrender. I like that. Keep on fighting and persevere even when your energy is low and your fighting spirit starts to ebb.

So today I was successful in starting my last treatment!!! Yippeeeeeee!!! My platelets rose just enough over the past three days to allow me to be treated today. Thank you, platelets. I guess you heard Leah Noel and I admonishing you to "get up". Thanks, Leah ;-)

Enough for now...the chemo drugs and anti-nausea drugs are taking me over and I need to sleep. The treatment room is busy today. Yikes. Way too many of us are fighting this horrible disease. But I will put that thought away and focus on my absolutely beautifully radiant and evermore pregnant wife who is 36 weeks this past Tuesday!



Until next post, I wish all good health and good spirits.

Looking for that silver lining

Just a brief update to all on a very stormy Monday in TO (or at least we are prepared for the storm to hit tonight) that my last treatment, Treatment #12, has been delayed.  My platelets have bottomed out again to their second lowest level, 66, in the 6 months of treatment.  The threshold for treatment for my Oncologist is 75 - and the only thing we can do right now is wait...give it time...let nature run its course and generate platelets and red blood cells over time.  

My parents were beside me in the waiting room today after making the long trek down from Guelph when my nurse came into the room to talk to me/us. Remember from a previous post that when they come into the room and sit down beside you that the news isn't good.  If it was good, if all was fine and I was given the green light for treatment they just come to the waiting room door and call your name to go into the Treatment room.  Monique, one of the ONC nurses, was sad for me to relay that Dr. Lingas wasn't going to take any chances with my health and safety and re-scheduled me for bloodwork for one week later - next Monday. After calling Victoria and letting her know the bad news she suggested I inquire about going back later in the week to try again rather than waiting a whole week.  So I spoke to the head nurse at the Clinic, Janet, and asked her if Thursday could be an option.  Although she is not optimistic that three days will be enough to bring my platelets up to a safe level she knows my/our story and knows that this is my last treatment and that Victoria is now 36 weeks pregnant and can really go into labour anytime.  So we will try again Thursday.  Cross our fingers and hope.

Admittedly I began to tear up and got a little emotional in the room when I was given the news...you see...I just want to get them over with...I am really really disappointed.  Every day of delay brings me closer to treatments running into Victoria's due date.  I had hoped to have some weeks of recovery time to at least gain some strength back and be feeling better when our baby is born...to be there for Victoria in labour when she needs me most.  We have actually hired a doula (birthing coach) to offer both me and Victoria additional support during labour since we know I won't be able to physically support Victoria how she will need to be supported.  After all, I can barely hold a pencil / pen in my hands let alone offer them to massaging Victoria, rubbing her swollen feet or provide relief to her physical pains.

So where is the silver lining in all this?  I guess I should feel good that despite all the urgency to finishing these treatments my doctor puts my health and safety before all and will not put me at risk with treatment today.  I guess it is a good thing that at least this week I will feel well enough to join Victoria at the new Birthing Centre at St. Joseph's for our tour of the birthing unit and might be able to join Victoria at the appointment with our mid-wife this week.  That's what I will focus on....these positives.

But man...enough already. Come on, platelets.  Let's go.  I want to do this...to put this treatment and what will be 7 months of chemo in the "Been there. Done that" column on life's ledger.  

Why I fight

Good Monday morning to all...I recognize that it has been a week since my last posting and that in my last post I promised to blog about something completely unrelated to my cancer, treatments, etc. but I want to take a moment to provide a quick update in this forum especially since so many of you have been in touch with me recently to find out how I am doing.  Frankly, this treatment has hit me hard...really hard.  I don't know whether it is because I was delayed a week or whether it is reflective of my suppressed immune system, bottoming out platelets and suppressed neutrophils but some of the side effects have been more intense this time around than anytime over the past six months....particularly the cold sensitivity, neuropathy, fatigue and GI issues.  My taste buds are shot - my stomach has been SOUR and my appetite non-existent.  My hands and feet are a complete mess - I can barely type, barely grip a pen and write - and I hope that they recover although there is a chance that some of this nerve damage can be permanent.  It is what it is.  With the Neupogen injections this time around the bone pain and aches in my spine, hips, legs, neck and skull have been brutal - to the point where I needed to take Tylenol 3 (with Codeine) to help me cope/sleep.  BUT...only one more to go.  Countdown - T minus 1.  Bring it. Let's do this.

Why I Fight

And now that I am done "ranting" let's get to the real purpose of this post...and one of the main reasons why I have kept focused, have tried to stay strong and positive, have put on the game face and faced this adversity head-on and with determination to come out on the positive side of it.  Enough of my talking, enough about cancer, enough about side effects, enough about neuropathy and Neupogen...let's let the pictures do the talking.

Victoria June 6  - about 14 wks

Victoria at about 16 wks

About 18 weeks

18 weeks

21 weeks

29 weeks

27 weeks

30 weeks

33 weeks

Victoria, you are my rock.  You are my best friend.  You have honoured me by being my wife.  You have stood by me and propped me up when things have been so rough these past few months.  You never let me wallow in self-pity or despair.  Those closest to us know that you are the real captain of the Kicking the Crap Crew ;-) You remind me every day what is important in life. 

And soon you will give birth to our baby and I cannot wait.  I am overwhelmed with joy.  You are going to be as wonderful a mom as you are a wife and partner.

Thank you for being you, Victoria.  

Treatment #11 in progress...I think Europe says it best

Well...I may have chemo brain these days and forget things that I am in the middle of doing or forget names or forget where I am driving to when in the car....but my drug addled brain tells me that if I am in the second day of Treatment #11 out of 12 that equals 92% of the way there!!!!  YIPPPPPPEEEEEE!!!!!!!

And it cannot be over soon enough...

So my Dad came into town to spend the day with me yesterday and take me to the hospital and join me in the treatment room (hopefully if all pans out with the bloodwork).  A shout out to Dad - if I didn't have him there and was alone yesterday I probably would have ended up falling asleep early on into treatment and slept through the afternoon in the clinic but we ended up talking about everything from Ontario politics, the XL Foods beef recall, the US Presidential election, cancer, family stuff, Victoria's pregnancy, etc.  Thanks, Dad for being with me yesterday.  You have no idea how much it means to me to have someone there with me on the next step in the journey....when I look around at the other patients in the treatment room it always hits me square in the face that I am the youngest person in the room and by quite a few years.  But I try not to dwell on that fact but it does strike me every time.

The bloodwork came back positive for treatment (Thank, God! - he must have heard my prayers ;-) ) after the week delay.  And as my good friend and fellow battler, Barb so eloquently articulates throughout her blog Bring it On! http://barb-james.blogspot.ca/ delays in treatment, bloodwork challenges that introduce things like transfusions (in her case) or bone marrow injections (in my case), all fuel our anxiety.  And you as you read me say that may struggle to understand in my case why it is so anxiety-evoking especially in light of the really positive news I have received over the past few weeks in terms of surveillance tests (CEA, CT scan)...but I don't want to give the bad cells, those f#$%ers ANY opportunity to do their dirty work.  One week delay in treatment means in my mind that every day that goes by I lose the opportunity to continue to punish them, to have the chemo drugs doing their job, and to keep those bad guys at bay.

My platelets rebounded to a healthy 133 from 59 last week (75 is the absolute lowest count where treatment is a no go decision) and my neutrophils rebounded to a great 2.6 count (up from 1.88).  The platelets were the big concern and short of platelet transfusions there is really no intervention that will increase these counts...just time for them to recover naturally.  So Treatment #11 was a GO.  Because of the week delay I didn't recognize any of the other patients in the treatment room as I am now on my third different treatment schedule - started with every other Thursday, to a Monday schedule to now an alternating Monday schedule.

I don't know whether it is because of the week delay or what but this one is really hitting me hard.  Last night when I came home from the hospital I was sooooooo flippin' tired that I napped for hours until Victoria had dinner ready.  I was able to eat dinner (and what a healthy dinner it was - baked salmon, sauteed spinach, and brown basmati rice with a cup of matcha green tea) and pretty much laid on the couch all evening not feeling so great....but last night's sleep was AWFUL.  My stomach was more sour than ever....in fact to the point of needing to spend hours by the toilet in anticipation of vomiting but thankfully it never got to that point.  I was sooooo weak and feeling crappy that I left the bed so Victoria wasn't exposed to me and ended up laying on the couch trying to sleep.  Sleep was broken with bouts of nausea and just feeling completely shitty.  But I managed to sleep after Victoria left for work this morning to now so I thought I would take advantage of the little energy I have today to update you all.

And btw...my Oncologist is not taking any chances with my neutrophils despite only having one last treatment to go.  I am undergoing another round of 5 daily injections of Neupogen to stimulate my bone marrow (these injections have really been taking their toll on me with the bone pain in my spine, hips, skull and neck).   But oh well....last round of injections.  Bring 'em on.

So that's it for now....I am wiped.  Just typing is a challenge these days (and you can forget about holding a pen or pencil and writing legibly).  I will post later with a message completely unrelated to my cancer and my treatments....stay tuned and thanks for stopping by.

I will leave this post with the words/lyrics from the band Europe and their song The Final Countdown:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AyggY_R3jU8

It's the final countdown
The final countdown
The final countdown
(The final countdown)
Ohh ho ohh

The final countdown, oh ho
It's the final countdown
The final countdown
The final countdown
(The final countdown)

Ohh
It's the final countdown
We're leaving together
The final countdown
We'll all miss her so
It's the final countdown
(The final countdown)
Ohh, it's the final countdown
Yea

Where oh where have my platelets gone?

Today was supposed to be Treatment #11...in fact I went in to the Oncology clinic this past Friday prior to the long weekend to get my bloodwork done to determine whether I would even have treatment today.  My Oncologist had warned me in our meeting to discuss my CT scan a week ago that treatment may be delayed in light of the drop in platelets from my previous bloodwork.  However, the bloodwork from this past Friday came back quite positive.  Platelets had rebounded to 91 (100 is the threshold for treatment but in light of there being only two treatments left there was good chance that we would push on with levels just below the threshold) and neutrophils were 2.05 (1.5 is the lowest threshold for treatment so I should have been fine with this count).  The nursing team told me to come in Tuesday (today) and prepare for treatment.

My sister, Jodie, who lives in Guelph made arrangements to take today off and come down to TO to accompany me at treatment.  She had never joined me previously and with three young girls and a husband at home it was a considerable gesture to arrange to be my Onc buddy for this treatment.  We headed for the hospital for my appointment time of 11am and I asked the receptionist if I was still required to do bloodwork today since I had had it done on Friday and she confirmed that Dr. Lingas (my Oncologist) considered the three day long weekend enough of a timeframe to warrant me having my bloodwork analyzed today. So...another bloodletting and wait in the waiting room that was packed, busy since the clinic was closed yesterday on Thanksgiving Monday.  Jodie and I had a good conversation about the process...about the usual routine for treatment. Then, one of the nurses, Michiko, came in to the waiting room and sat down beside us to talk about the bloodwork.  As soon as she sat down beside me I knew the news wasn't good - you see, if you are cleared for treatment the nurses simply come to the door of the waiting room and call you into the treatment room.  And the news isn't good.

My platelets have dropped to a dangerous count of 59.  This was a significant drop over the weekend and represents the lowest they have ever been since treatments began in May.  Of more importance this level means I now suffer from chemotherapy induced thrombocytopenia.  This condition makes me at a significant risk for bleeding as the clotting factor in my blood has been compromised.  It isn't quite at the dangerous level for internal bleeding but the downward trend is alarming and needs to be monitored.  (http://www.chemotherapy.com/side_effects/platelet/managing_platelet_count.html) It also might be why I have been so friggin' fatigued inside my bones - basically I have no strength.  None. Nada.  And no stamina.  Climbing stairs is almost embarrassing for this once physically fit male.  My hips ache, my knees and legs have no energy or strength.  I sometimes even have to grab the banister to pull myself up - when noone is looking of course.

My neutrophils dropped to 1.88.  This is above the lowest threshold for treatment but represents a significant drop in three days even after a round of Neupogen injections the week previous which are meant to stimulate my bone marrow to produce neutrophils.  So the downward trend is alarming and makes me immune compromised...at risk for infection, fever, illnesses that would otherwise be warded off in healthy individuals but unfortunately can pose a serious threat to cancer patients like me whose immune systems are compromised.  A simple fever or infection is an Emergency room visit.  Admittedly I have been seriously fortunate all things considered for the course of treatments...I haven't yet succombed to any flu, fever, sickness in the 5 months of chemo on top of the side effects of the therapy.

What does it all mean?  Well it means that I was not well enough to continue treatments today.  In fact, Dr. Lingas has requested a delay of an entire week for the next treatment.  Damn.  I am trying really really hard to focus on something positive but it is tough to do so.  I guess I feel very fortunate that my Oncologist insisted on doing bloodwork today even after having it done on Friday and that she is putting my safety and health at the forefront.  Delays in chemo treatments are crappy.  Ironically we cancer patients want to get through these treatments according to the prescribed schedule for maximum efficacy - the protocols are designed with a schedule that sets dosing and cycles of treatment to maximize/optimize their results.  My attitude from day one has been let's go....full dose...manage the side effects as best as can be but stick with full dose to optimize the results.  Kill the beast...do their job.

So I will cling to the positive that my safety is top priority and accept that treatment #11 will have to wait another week.  That means that my last treatment will be at minimum October 30 and possibly not until the first week of November.  Victoria's due date is November 27.  With treatments going into November we are both sad, anxious, desperate for the end of the treatment cycle.  I soooooo badly want...no...need to be stronger and feeling better than I have been when the baby arrives.  I have no idea how long it may take for me to recover from these treatments...I would imagine some side effects will take much much longer to resolve themselves if they indeed do such as the peripheral neuropathy, mucositis, fatigue. And now to add to the list my fingers are a complete mess...I mean they are a disaster...it is painful for me just to type this blog post.  The nails are disintegrating and my fingertips are constantly in nerve pain.  My chemo coach, Aunt Diana, has "warned" me about this possible side effect and it has now come into effect full force in the past month.

It is what it is.  Treatment #11 will have to wait a week....but then there is just one left after that.   The end.  No more chemo.

So in tribute to my friend and fellow battler, Barb...BRING IT ON.

And the survey says...I mean Surgeon says...

So yesterday I met with my Surgeon, Dr. Hart, for my post-CT scan, 6 month post-surgery, follow-up.  I went into yesterday's meeting buoyed by my meeting with Dr. Lingas (my Oncologist) the previous Thursday but still anxious...anxious that Dr. Hart and Dr. Lingas are on the same page and that my CT scan showed nothing of worry to my operating surgeon, to the doctor that had originally resected my colon with urgency in  March and intervened upon diagnosis on that fateful day in March.  Although I emotionally was so relieved on Thursday I spent the entire weekend processing the CT scan printout, processing the discussion with Dr. Lingas, processing these "anomalies" on my lungs and liver and trying really hard not to worry.  Unfortunately I physically felt lousy this past weekend as the Neupogen injections really hit me hard this time around...or at least I blame it on the injections to stimulate my bone marrow to produce WBCs / neutrophils.  Maybe it is that my platelets have dropped considerably (81 on the last blood analysis) and are approaching danger zone territory.  Whatever the cause my lower back and spine were in constant spasm, my hips and legs ached, and my appetite wasn't great.  Tylenol would only take the edge off my bone and nervous system pain.  But such is my life these days - only 2 more treatments and rounds of injections to manage through.  Bring 'em on.

Within moments of seeing Dr. Hart I was at ease.  He suggested that in light of what he saw on the scan that there was nothing to worry about and that next surveillance from a surgical / post-surgery perspective would be a colonoscopy next March - exactly one year from original diagnosis and surgery.  He also suggested that  our respective meetings from this point on were really just social visits since there was nothing clinical to discuss - the CT scan, the bloodwork, all are pointing to good news at this stage.

So...now that my appetite has returned and I have received great news from both my Oncologist AND my Surgeon I think it is time Victoria and I really celebrate...with a good meal out...maybe Indian....after all we both LOVE Indian cuisine and it is cancer friendly with all its spice.

In terms of upcoming treatment(s) that is really the only bad news we received this past week.  Unfortunately as I indicated previously my platelets have dropped to the lowest point for me during chemo and there is a pretty good chance that my next treatment will be delayed for some time until they rebound.  I will go in for bloodwork before the weekend to see if indeed the platelets will be too low for treatment scheduled on Tuesday following the Thanksgiving weekend.  Hopefully the delay will only be a few days and let's get it done with sooner rather than later.  I so badly want to recover some strength before our baby is born and really " be there" for Victoria and our newborn.  After all November 27 (our official due date) is just around the corner....

In honour of the upcoming Thanksgiving weekend I hope that everyone who has taken the time to stop by and read my blog finds themselves surrounded by family, friends, love and laughter and finds something that they are truly thankful for and acknowledges it.  I know I am thankful for so much now that this will truly be a celebration and a time for me to give thanks. 

Round One goes to me...planning for a TKO in this fight

Many of you who are my Facebook friends have seen my latest status update shouting out the news about my 6 month CT scan....that (and I quote) according to the Radiologist report from my enhanced contrast of pelvis, abdomen, liver, lungs etc. "there is no convincing evidence of metastasis".  And I know that it is just six months in but I will rack up this milestone as a first round victory.

What an emotional, thought-provoking, anxiety-laden process this has been since Monday's scan.  You see this represents the first real surveillance of my cancer...in combination with the CEA (carcinoembryonic antigen) blood tests recently which came back normal (no elevation of a specific protein/antigen that is positive in 75% of colon cancer patients).  The CT scan from this past Monday would be compared with the CT scan done in-hospital March 16 2012 just prior to the colon resection surgery and with a scan done a few days later after surgery when fluid was detected in my colon near the resection site and I had developed an infection / fever.  It was at THAT scan that they detected a 3mm shadow/spot on my liver.  Shock and fear immediately flooded through me at that time.  These kinds of findings can touch at the very darkest fears for cancer patients as it very well could indicate spread of the primary cancer to other systems/ organs.  In my case my tumour was staged at Stage IIIb with 2 of 17 lymph node samples taken from surgery come back positive for cancer.  So the fear of spread and infiltration into the lymphatic system consumed me.

Within seconds of coming in the door to my Oncologist's office on Thursday she turned to Victoria and I and smiled and said it all looks good, she is not worried and does not see any evidence of spread.  Her positivity immediately put me and Victoria at ease. She pulled up the final report from the radiologist and after reading it I swallowed hard and asked for clarification.  You see the latest scan showed 3 small (4mm) spots on the left lung - which I was never aware that had been detected in March.  However, Dr. Lingas described them as abnormalities (actually "normal" imperfections like skin pimples, scars, etc.) which are rather normal.  More importantly there was no clinical change / visual change whatsoever in terms of these spots from 6 months prior which indicates no growth, no change, no malignancy.  The spot on my liver that had been at the focus of the second scan in March was exactly identical as 6 months ago - again indicating no malignancy or spread.  I will repeat the final sentence of the Summary paragraph of the report:  There is no convincing evidence of metastasis.

Yeahhhhhhh!!!! F$@#ing right!!!!!  Let's celebrate this first significant milestone.   Next surveillance will be a colonoscopy at 1 year from surgery  -next March - or almost 6 months from today.  In terms of my future and surveillance I need to put this all into context. This scan was the first surveillance...there will be many more over the next 3 to 5 years.  Pretty much every 6 months or so whether it is CEA bloodtests or colonoscopies or CT scans I will be monitored for the next 5 years.  Remember 5 years is the end goal to be completely cancer free, no recurrence, no metastasis.  Statistically with colon cancer a huge percentage of recurrence rates occur within the first 3 years.  So this will be my life for the next few years.

Using a boxing analogy I have decided to break down this 5 year period into a 10 round fight - 10 Rounds of 6 months surveillance.     The end goal is a TKO (technical knock-out) over this cancer.  And as far as I am concerned Round 1 goes to Dave Brown...I am still in the ring fighting and will continue to fight, to punch, to kick the crap out of this cancer.

I cannot end this post without sending a shout out to all of you who bless me with your support, your encouragement, your positive energy.  Believe me when I say that even though I may not respond to every text message, email, blog comment, Facebook message etc. I read and receive every single message and they continue to give me strength.

Thank you, thank you, thank you all.  You are all honourary members of The Kicking the Crap Crew!!!!

Tell me why I don't like Mondays

Those of you who are regular followers of my blog know that I like to integrate music and lyrics references into my blogs when it strikes as me in just the right way...so visualize me singing to the famous Boomtown Rats song. The chorus goes like this:

Tell me why I don't like Mondays

Tell me why I don't like Mondays

Tell me why I don't like Mondays

I wanna shoot the whole day down

You see yesterday Monday September 24 was a "busy" day (substitute the word busy with words like exhausting, anxiety-laden, intense).  Not only did it include (hopefully) the next treatment but also the crucial enhanced CT scan at six months surveillance to determine the status of my cancer.  So yesterday began with an 8:30 visit to the Oncology clinic at St. Josephs for bloodwork prior to my scan.  From the 6th floor East building getting blood-work drawn it was downstairs to Ground level Main floor Diagnostic Imaging for registration and prep which involved drinking a tall glass of special water one hour in advance of the scan.  My parents accompanied me today and actually came down the night prior, staying in the guest suite of our condo building...more on my parents and our time together shortly.  We waited in the DI waiting room for an hour until the scheduled scan, talking, keeping my mind busy not dwelling on the scan until called in (and had to drink another tall glass of that special water). Smartly I had applied some EMLA cream on my wrist where I thought they would insert the IV line while waiting and the IV line insertion was pain free (thanks again Barb and Nancy!!!!).  The actual CT scan was not something new to me.  If you remember I had two when in hospital / inpatient for my surgery back in March - the first being a scan prior to surgery and the second one mid-week while recovering from surgery (since I had developed an infection / fever) producing a real scare when it detected a spot on my liver (which ended up being cleared as not detectable through a follow-up ultrasound.  A spot on a distant organ from the primary site detected on a scan/ X-ray/ ultrasound whatever can be sooooo intensely scary for a cancer patient or at least in my mind.  It is almost the ultimate in bad news that caused me so intense an anxiety reaction then despite the ultrasound clearance.  It hit to my darker fears and came right in the context of an already intensely emotional time when so much was happening all at once.  But back to the scan yesterday...the procedure itself takes about 10 minutes or so, involves no pain but does involve the machine injecting a special dye about halfway through the scan that warms you internally all over your body and instantly gives a strange metallic taste in the mouth that doesn't go away for some time.  You are instructed to breath, hold your breath, breath, hold your breath repeatedly as this loud machine spins around you.  It really is a unique experience.

After the scan was over it was back up to the 6th floor Oncology clinic to find out how the blood-work taken earlier had come back and for treatment.  The nurses called me in for treatment which was / is positive news...at the end of the day it means the team assessed my blood-work as being healthy enough to continue treatment.  Although it does turn out that my platelets had dropped significantly...81.  Again not in the danger zone for imminent bleed but still low.  Everything else of significance incidentally - WBCs, neutrophils, hemoglobin - all showed normal to strong/healthy levels.  So my Oncologist and pharmacist conferred and decided to continue with treatment as we are determined to push through the last three treatments if healthy enough and continue with Neupogen injections to keep the WBC and neutrophil counts up.  So another four weeks of pretty brutal side effects, extreme fatigue and some bone pain that radiates out from my spine to my hips, legs and neck, but in the immortal words of my friend and fellow battler and blogger Barb - bring it on!!!!  There is nothing we can do about platelets dropping other than delay treatment (not ideal) and reduce dosage.  The decision was made to continue treatment, monitor the platelets closely, and keep me at full dosage of the chemo.  And folks...from my perspective that is good news.  I want to keep pushing on through these last three treatments at FULL dose...let's give this cancer everything we got...kick the crap out of it NOW.  And let me recover enough strength to be there fully for my wife and baby on the way...THAT is the ultimate goal for me.

So...Treatment 10 is underway.    YIPPPPPEEEEE!!!!!!! Again referring to my grade school math I think that works out to 83% of the way done!!!!!!!!!  Only 2 more treatments to go.   Let's get it on.  I am sitting here on my couch with my 5FU infusion bottle by my side slowly infusing me through a tube in my chest hooked up to my port as I write this. Tomorrow a nurse will come to my home and disconnect the infusion as normal.  Thursday Victoria will begin injecting me daily with Neupogen for 5 days.  

But I hope that I am not giving off entirely negative vibes in this post.  You see my parents came down for this important day and that is something that is really special to me.  They hadn't joined me at any of my treatments prior and were adamant that they wanted to be there for the CT scan...they had heard and felt my anxiety about the day and expressed a desire to be a part of the day.  As I wrote above they came down for a visit with Victoria and I Sunday night and we went out for a wonderful dinner at Lahore Tikka in Little India of Toronto...one of our favourite spots...and enjoyed authentic Pakistani and northern Indian cuisine which we all love.  Conversation flowed and just like my short-term sabbatical to Tobermory the week before was just what I needed, just what the doctor ordered.  Although we talked a little about my feelings about the day to come we talked about so much else that really allowed me to forget all about it at least temporarily.

And honestly I think not only was it great for me to have my parents with me for the day I respectfully think it was really good for them as well...to see my routine, my process if you will with regard to the Oncology treatments which have been my life for the past 4 months.  They got to meet my nursing team and my Oncologist, Dr. Lingas, who are all so caring and so positive.  In fact Dr. Lingas was kind enough to come see me during treatment and talk to me about the CT scan and next steps...as I had requested to talk to her about it.  I have a scheduled appointment to discuss the results with my surgeon, Dr. Hart, but not until the following Thursday October 4 - 10 days of agonizing waiting - not ideal.  As soon as she heard or saw my anxiety she suggested we meet this Thursday when she will have the report from the Radiologist.  And I immediately agreed.  She made a point of saying in front of my parents that I am one of her patients she is NOT worried about...that the scan will be good news and that she doesn't worry.   Her positive attitude and energy is so helpful.  I don't want to speak for other cancer patients or patients who are battling such a serious life-altering disease but I would rather have the information, regardless of what it is, sooner rather than later.  I can act on information.  As my blog suggests I am all about my own empowerment to take in information and act, advocate, drive things as I need to.

My parents Jim and Jean accompanying me in the treatment room (we were one over the limit!)

The two-hour infusion complete waiting for the loading dose and hook-up to the 5FU infusion bottle and head home

So...Dr. Lingas and I will meet on Thursday to discuss my CT scan.  Victoria is going to join me- nothing short of her going into early labour will stop that. And I will share the results afterward.  When, how, to who, how soon...I don't know.  But I will post and update you all on my blog when I am inspired to.  And I plan to SHOUT the GOOD NEWS out so loudly that everyone can enjoy it with me without need for smartphone, text, email, Internet blog.  I cannot wait to celebrate that as of six months of battling I am currently cancer free, winning the battle and kicking the crap out my colon cancer.

Before I end this long, rambling but emotionally laden post I want to give a special shout out to some very special members of Team Brown, honorary members of the Kicking the Crap Crew.  Not to exclude anyone else but these people have been so supportive from day one of diagnosis, have been my coaches if you will...and have selflessly surprised with big little gestures like timely messages, gifts of golf shirts, autographed picture of Bryan Adams - accompanied by notes to me full of support and love that have just buoyed my spirits and given me a burst of internal strength on days when I haven't felt so strong.  A shout out to my Aunt Diana and Uncle John Loomis, cousin Liz Loomis-Taliano and her family John and Isabella.  I appreciate your love and support...and I appreciate you.

\

And a shout out to some others in the inner circle...my sister Jodie and her husband and my brother in law Brad, my parents, my sister Laura and her partner Bill, Colleen Baker, husband Rob Baker, co-workers and friends Kelly L, Julie-Noelle,  friends of ours Diane, Tony, Linda...and last but certainly not least my rock, my best friend, Victoria - your messages to me throughout the day yesterday helped get me through the day.  For anyone I have missed I blame it on the chemo brain ;-)  Just know that I definitely felt the positive energy you sent my way - and appreciate you for it.

Sending out positive vibes into the cosmos...and hoping for all your positive energy in return.   Until next time stay healthy everyone.

Rub a dub...hello from The Tub

Hello from beautiful Tobermory! I decided to escape from the big city earlier this week to the cottage for some much needed peace and tranquility...and I have it here in spades. Wow is it quiet up here on the lake and in town. In fact, Parker and I went into town yesterday with intention to grab a cup of green tea, blog on the patio of The Coffee Shoppe and grab some fresh local whitefish for dinner. We didn't make it into town until later in the afternoon, after 5pm, and much to our/my shock... everything was closed except the Foodland and LCBO. The Coffee Shoppe apparently closes at 3pm daily now and the fish store closed at 5pm. And I think I counted 4 people out on the streets of Tobermory while Parker and I walked around. Yikes! What a contrast from mid summer when The Tub is a busy energetic town thriving with tourists.

But this peace and quiet is exactly what I wanted...exactly "what the doctor ordered". You see... next Monday is an anxiety laden day for me (and my family). I am scheduled for a CAT scan for enhanced imagery of my pelvis, liver, abdomen, chest and lungs. This scan at four months is an important surveillance test which will assess the state of my cancer four months post surgery and with adjuvant therapy. Essentially it will tell my doctors whether (to quote my surgeon) "they got it all"...whether there has been any spread of the primary tumour to other organs...whether the chemotherapy has done its job to date in preventing any recurrence of the cancer. And admittedly I am worried. I am trying to NOT dwell, to NOT fear the tests (the results not the actual test), and to focus on ALL the positive things that have been going on with my life like my marriage to Victoria, the birth of our child in November, my wonderful in laws, family and friends...and all the positive things related to my battle against cancer such as my surgeon's assessment that his team was successful in removing the entire tumour, the low grade nature of the tumour suggesting that it was not aggressive, the blood tests that came back recently that showed no elevation of carcinoembryonic antigen, etc.

While I was hoping to spend some time outdoors up here at the cottage and potentially even take the boat out and land Cameron Lake Charlie my hands and feet neuropathy just would not allow me to do anything outside...just a couple of minutes trying to take off the boat cover had my fingers stinging like they were being stuck with needles. So no dice on doing anything outdoors in the cold. But I had no itinerary for my retreat up here other than to rest and relax...so I rented some movies and made a great dinner and chilled out with P dog. Perfect. And whether it is the cool fresh air or just being at the cottage I slept well...deep...refreshing...and well.

Anyway it is time to head back to the big city and reconnect with Victoria and attend our pre-natal class...enjoy the beautiful long drive home...and keep focused on the positive, think about positive results next week and continue to be winning the battle.

Until next time...sending good thoughts out into the cosmos. Take care all.

All by myself...don't wanna be...all by myself

To appreciate the title of this posting you will need to picture Eric Carmen sitting at a piano singing his mournful song "All By Myself"...and then imagine me sitting in a recliner at the Oncology Clinic at St. Joe's with tubes sticking out of the port in my chest all by myself...all alone other than the nurses and fellow patients of the clinic. With Victoria back at work and my treatments moved to Mondays I ended up driving myself in to treatment today...and never again. Maybe it is the drugs, maybe it is the sight of some of my fellow patients...maybe I am just tired today...sick and tired of being sick and tired....who knows....but for some reason I am feeling a little emotional today...sad...lonely. But then I think "Hey! You have made it to treatment 9!!! 3/4 of the way there!!!" and I feel so much more positive.

And today the news is all good. My bloodwork came back with my neutrophils back up to 2.02 and my platelets are up over 90 so that is good news. My Onc has written another Rx for Neupogen - 5 injections starting this Thursday....so that is good news for Victoria since she will be able to "stick it to me again" :-)

I talked to my Onc about the severe bone pain I experienced last weekend and she reassured me that it was related to the Neupogen injections and NOT the cancer. And for someone battling cancer it was very easy for me to worry immediately that the pain I felt in my spine, my lower back, my neck, my hips and my skull was indicative of a spread of cancer to my spine, my hips, my neck and my skull. So for this round she recommends that I take Tylenol or Percocet if needed before my injections to combat the pain.

And today I decided to source some Emla cream to numb the port and negate any pain from my nurses drawing blood or hooking up my IV. THANKS, Barb!!! You rock. Boy what a difference that makes. I figure I have endured enough pain in the past six months so if I can numb the pain for the remaining four treatments and further blood tests then let's numb the pain!!!

My next treatment and hospital visit will follow a CAT scan to surveil my organs and system for any signs of cancer. Two weeks. Two weeks. My anxiety is already high. I will plan to mentally focus on positive things over the next two weeks like our baby that is growing so quickly now in Victoria's belly...maybe I will go to the cottage by myself for a couple of days of serenity...maybe I will book a deep tissue massage before the 24th to release any anxiety that I carry.

Until then let's keep doing what we are doing. It is all part if the treatment plan...the battle...to kick the crap out of this f^**ing cancer.

Until next post...take care all. Thank you for stopping by and "listening" to me.

And the results are in...

This past week has been quite an event filled week...a return to treatment on Monday, a series of Neupogen injections starting on Thursday, a visit by good friends, Andrew and Leah, who so graciously donated so many things for our baby, a wonderful dinner out with Victoria's brother, Rob, and his daughter, Olivia, and partner, Sara...a visit to my Naturopath for reassessing our approach to date and adjust...a great visit with Victoria's parents in Wasaga Beach with wonderful weather and R&R, and a lovely dinner with my family to end the last weekend of summer before back-to-school/work.

Our visit with Dr. Genuardi, my Naturopath, was excellent.  It seems that she is happy with my dietary program and adherence to the program.  We added a couple of things such as goji berries for added Vitamin C intake and discussed some supplementation of both Vitamin C and magnesium.  It seems that it is unrealistic to obtain these critical vitamins and minerals from diet and that some supplementation is required.   We also discussed a natural approach to boosting my immune system and to encouraging the immune system to generate neutrophils...and approaching long term immune system support after the treatments are completed.  Her guidance is to use colostrum/ bovine milks from cows that have just calved - just like human breast milk apparently this milk source is full of antibodies that stimulate the immune system.  I will discuss with my Oncology team and explore this supplementation as part of our treatment plan.  Victoria was also able to obtain some guidance for her drop in iron levels at this stage in her pregnancy and a supplement to address it and she has started on an iron supplement that will hopefully help her energy level, mood and swelling.

The actual Neupogen injections, administered by Victoria with joy I am sure ;-) were really not that bad at all...the needle is so small in terms of gauge that the pain was pretty much non-existent. The injections are required to stimulate the immune system, my bone marrrow, to raise the neutrophil levels and to prevent any further delay in treatments.  However on the weekend I developed a real deep pain and "spasm" that originated in my lower back and pulsated out to my hips, my neck, my skull...and it admittedly concerned me.  Not only was it a bit debilitating but it was scary. I wasn't expecting this type of side effect (I assume it was a side effect of the bone marrow stimulation from the Neupogen) nor have I ever felt this type of pain before.  I had cautioned by my Oncology team to expect bone pain but didn't know exactly how that would manifest itself. As a cancer patient I struggled mentally to NOT go to a place of thinking immediately that this pain, originating from the centre of my lower back and pulsating outward, was indicative of a spread of cancer to other areas of my body.  I put it down to a side effect of the  drug stimulating my bone marrow in my spine and elsewhere.   When it spread to my hips I felt really really old....like an old man with barely the strength to walk upright.  Thankfully this only lasted a couple of days.

But it's not all bad...the analysis of my bloodwork prior to my last treatment included a requisition by my Oncologist for a Carcinoembryonic Antigen (CEA) test to monitor the cancer markers in my blood / serum.  Cancer of the colon typically secrets a protein known as carcinoembryonic antigen and 70% of colon cancer patients return positive markers for this protein . http://www.lifelabs.com/Lifelabs_BC/Patients/MedicalConditions/Colon_Cancer_-_CEA.asp

So...elevated levels of CEA in the blood can indicate recurrence of the tumour or metastatic spread to other areas of the body.  This CEA test is one of the key surveillance / monitoring tools particularly for colon cancer.  

My Oncologist and I had discussed this test several weeks ago as an answer to my question about how we would monitor or surveil my cancer and the success of the treatments to prevent recurrence or spread.  This CEA test, after four months post-surgery and two-thirds of the way through adjuvant therapy, would be part of this surveillance.  This would be followed by the CAT scan at the end of September to give a thorough picture of my status.  Admittedly, I had quite a bit of anxiety leading up to this first blood test.  I am aware of the limitations of the test in that it can return false positive results, that only 70% of those with colon cancer actually return a positive elevation in CEA, that chemotherapy can cause an elevation in these markers and was conditioning myself mentally to consider the results of the CEA test as objectively as possible.  

And the results are in...at this stage in treatment, 4 months post-surgery and with adjuvant FOLFOX therapy, the CEA test showed this protein within normal levels...no elevation of the CEA levels in my blood nor any significant trend upward in CEA levels from prior to the initiation of adjuvant therapy.  And THAT is great news!!!!!  My Oncologist is not concerned with the CEA levels in any way and THAT is also great news.

So...this news goes a long way to keep me positive....to keep me fighting the good fight...to urge me to kick the crap out of this colon cancer.